Nasdaq Beater
Rate Of Return🎪 U.S. Stocks Today · March 28 · Limited Tragedy Edition
Dow -1.73% | Nasdaq -2.15% | S&P -1.67%
U.S. and Israel suddenly decide: It's Friday, bored, let's bomb Iran for fun 💣
Wall Street: ??? I'm not closed yet!!!
Dow faints on the spot, drops 793 points
Emergency doctor (The Fed): I'm in a meeting, hold on 🩺
Tech stocks collectively issue a statement:
"We just sell ads and algorithms, we really don't know nuclear physics" 😭
The worst off are those who just added positions on Friday afternoon—
Your courage moves heaven and earth 🕯️🕯️🕯️
Oil price: Thanks to this war, I'm feeling better ⛽️📈$Occidental Petroleum(OXY.US)$Alphabet(GOOGL.US)$NVIDIA(NVDA.US)
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