<p>我們都知道那種送禮的人——他們在遞給你禮物時，立刻提到找到這個禮物有多困難、花了多少錢或者運送花了多長時間。禮儀專家表示，這種行為會讓善意的舉動變得不舒服，甚至顯得無禮。</p>
<p>“在一個理想化的世界裏，禮物是你對他人愛與尊重的具體表達，” Mannersmith 禮儀諮詢公司的總裁 Jodi R.R. Smith 告訴 HuffPost。“它是你們關係的晴雨表。禮物是將你的感情轉化為物品或體驗的一種方式，而這種方式是你的言語或行為無法做到的。”</p>
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<p>但並不是每個人在送禮時都能反映出這種意義。即使是最有善意的贈送者也可能會陷入一些顯得無禮的習慣。</p>
<p>HuffPost 請 Smith 和其他禮儀專家分享一些常見的送禮無禮行為。繼續閲讀，瞭解送禮時應避免的八個失禮之處以及你應該如何做。</p>
<h2><strong>提及價格</strong></h2>
<p>“在送禮時，不要告訴別人這件禮物花了多少錢，” 禮儀專家、播客 “你是被狼養大的？” 的聯合主持人 Nick Leighton 説。“最好的禮物是那些用心的，而不是那些昂貴的。如果你回想一下你一生中收到的所有禮物，你最喜歡的那些肯定不是最貴的。”</p>
<p>禮物不必昂貴才能對接受者有價值。送禮者還應考慮與對方的關係以及什麼價格範圍是合適的。</p>
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<p>“無禮的行為是評論價格，” Smith 説。“贈送者應該在自己的預算範圍內購物。你不應該為了送禮而負債。你可能花了少量或大量的錢。只要在你的預算範圍內，這才是重要的。”</p>
<h2><strong>期待回禮</strong></h2>
<p>“最常見且無禮的失禮之一是，當你給某人禮物，他們興奮地打開時，你接着説，‘那麼，我的禮物呢？’” From the Inside-Out 禮儀學校的創始人 Jackie Vernon-Thompson 説。“這是一個巨大的禁忌。禮物絕不應該在期待收到回禮的情況下贈送。最純粹的贈送形式根植於慷慨，而不是期待。”</p>
<p>她強調，贈送不是關於期待，而是關於自由地給予。</p>
<p>“如果你送的禮物附帶條件，那它真的算是禮物嗎？” Leighton 説。“如果一份禮物需要解釋，那可能是它不是一份好禮物的跡象。”</p>
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<p>確實，唯一真正的回報是接受者的感激和興奮的表情。如果你期待回禮，請考慮你可能會在不同的時間收到它。</p>
<p>“贈送確實傾向於是一種互惠關係。但它並不總是需要同時進行，” Smith 説。</p>
<p><img src="https://imageproxy.pbkrs.com/https://s.yimg.com/ny/api/res/1.2/8o7JIg5s1wTwweNq7rnE3w--/YXBwaWQ9aGlnaGxhbmRlcjt3PTEyNDI7aD04Mjg-/https://media.zenfs.com/en/the_huffington_post_584/d159cb03c8bde1b40ed1edfb3a88be1b?x-oss-process=image/auto-orient,1/interlace,1/resize,w_1440,h_1440/quality,q_95/format,jpg" alt="" original-src="https://imageproxy.pbkrs.com/https://s.yimg.com/ny/api/res/1.2/8o7JIg5s1wTwweNq7rnE3w--/YXBwaWQ9aGlnaGxhbmRlcjt3PTEyNDI7aD04Mjg-/https://media.zenfs.com/en/the_huffington_post_584/d159cb03c8bde1b40ed1edfb3a88be1b"/></p>
<p>贈送不是關於期待。Anastasia Babenko via Getty Images</p>
<h2><strong>貶低你的禮物</strong></h2>
<p>Smith 建議在給接受者禮物時，不要立刻貶低你的禮物。</p>
<p>“‘這只是一些小東西。’‘我在打折時找到的。’‘這真的沒什麼大不了的。’ 停下。你在給某人禮物，不要貶低它，” 她説。</p>
<h2><strong>送出沒有心意的禮物</strong></h2>
<p>“無禮的行為包括送出沒有心意的禮物，” 禮儀專家、書籍《更好生活的現代禮儀》的作者 Diane Gottsman 説。“例如，明顯被使用或磨損的東西。或者顯然不適合他們的東西，或者在購買時幾乎沒有考慮。”</p>
<p>你的禮物不必昂貴，但應該表現出一定程度的關心或努力。</p>
<p>“對於禮物，確實是心意最重要，” Smith 説。“雖然很少有人會拒絕奢華的禮物，但你與接受者的關係越親密，贈送時就應該投入更多的心思。”</p>
<h2><strong>不考慮接受者</strong></h2>
<p>“在送禮者方面，請考慮你要送給誰，並使其適合他們，而不是你想要的或你擁有的東西，並且經過一些思考你知道這並不合適，” Q&amp;A 平台 JustAnswer 的禮儀專家 August Abbott 説。“重要的是考慮你要送禮物的人，而不是你自己的喜好、需求和想要的東西。”</p>
<p>如果你對這個人不太瞭解，她建議選擇一個安全的選項，比如咖啡店或外賣服務的禮品卡。</p>
<p>“在選擇禮物之前，重要的是以意圖和深思熟慮的方式接近這個過程，” Vernon-Thompson 説。“考慮接受者的個性、偏好和喜歡的事物。目標是選擇他們真正會欣賞的東西，而不是一個會被擱置或遺忘的物品。輕微而微妙地詢問他們的願望清單通常是有幫助的——一點探詢可以確保你的禮物真正引起共鳴。”</p>
<p><img src="https://imageproxy.pbkrs.com/https://s.yimg.com/ny/api/res/1.2/6vEWzRjIxIeGSPGq_EyJjg--/YXBwaWQ9aGlnaGxhbmRlcjt3PTEyNDI7aD04MzA-/https://media.zenfs.com/en/the_huffington_post_584/bc66abfe5028377a2e7aee790bf12061?x-oss-process=image/auto-orient,1/interlace,1/resize,w_1440,h_1440/quality,q_95/format,jpg" alt="" original-src="https://imageproxy.pbkrs.com/https://s.yimg.com/ny/api/res/1.2/6vEWzRjIxIeGSPGq_EyJjg--/YXBwaWQ9aGlnaGxhbmRlcjt3PTEyNDI7aD04MzA-/https://media.zenfs.com/en/the_huffington_post_584/bc66abfe5028377a2e7aee790bf12061"/></p>
<p>注意你送禮的時間和場合。Maryna Terletska via Getty Images</p>
<h2><strong>送出不合適的禮物</strong></h2>
<p>“避免送出個人和親密的禮物——內衣、浴袍、香水等等，” Vernon-Thompson 建議。“這些個人禮物可能暗示超出當前關係的東西。這肯定會讓對方感到尷尬。”</p>
<p>她鼓勵送禮者從接受者的角度考慮你們之間關係的性質和深度。</p>
<p>“你絕不想送出一份過於個人化、過於奢華或讓人感到不適的禮物，因為你對關係的理解與他們不同，” Vernon-Thompson 説。“如果不確定，選擇一些中性、合適和適度的禮物。過度消費可能無意中造成一種負擔感——你可不想這樣。”</p>
<h2><strong>明顯的再贈禮</strong></h2>
<p>人們對再贈禮有很多看法，但 Smith 表示，只要不是明顯的再贈禮，這樣做是可以的。例如，把你從表弟那裏收到的毛衣送給另一個表弟可能是在玩火。如果你是有意傳遞一個重要的家族傳家寶，那麼你可以坦誠它的意義和歷史。</p>
<p>“否則，只要它是新的、未使用的、未拆封的，並且原贈與者和新的接受者不在同一個社交圈子裏，再贈禮是完全可以接受的，” Smith 説。</p>
<h2><strong>在不合適的時間送禮</strong></h2>
<p>在選擇送禮的時機上也有禮儀。</p>
<p>“贈與者還應該注意周圍的環境，” Smith 説。“首先，如果沒有其他人交換禮物，而在場有其他人，你的禮物應該暫時收起來，等到稍後再送。其次，如果正在進行其他活動，禮物可能需要等一等。”</p>
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<p><strong>在 HuffPost 上閲讀原文</strong></p>

<p>禮儀專家強調了在送禮中常見的粗魯行為，例如提及禮物的價格、期待回禮、貶低禮物、送出缺乏心意的禮物以及不考慮收禮人的感受。他們強調，禮物應該是對愛與尊重的深思熟慮的表達，沒有附加條件，並且應反映與收禮人之間的關係</p>

<p>We all know <em>that</em> gift giver ― the one who hands you a present and immediately mentions how hard it was to find, how expensive it was or how long the shipping took. Etiquette experts say behaviors like this can make a kind gesture feel uncomfortable and even rude.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>我們都知道那種送禮的人——他們在遞給你禮物時，立刻提到找到這個禮物有多困難、花了多少錢或者運送花了多長時間。禮儀專家表示，這種行為會讓善意的舉動變得不舒服，甚至顯得無禮。</p>
</div><p>“In an idealized world, gifts are a tangible expression of your love and esteem for someone else,” Jodi R.R. Smith, president of Mannersmith Etiquette Consulting, told HuffPost. “It is a bellwether for your relationship. A gift is a way of turning your feelings into an object or experience is a way your words or actions cannot.”</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“在一個理想化的世界裏，禮物是你對他人愛與尊重的具體表達，” Mannersmith 禮儀諮詢公司的總裁 Jodi R.R. Smith 告訴 HuffPost。“它是你們關係的晴雨表。禮物是將你的感情轉化為物品或體驗的一種方式，而這種方式是你的言語或行為無法做到的。”</p>
</div><p><strong>Life: The Rudest Things You Can Do When Receiving A Gift</strong></p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p><strong>生活：接受禮物時你能做的最無禮的事情</strong></p>
</div><p>But not everyone approaches gift-giving in a way that reflects that meaning. Even the most well-intentioned giver can slip into habits that come off as rude.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>但並不是每個人在送禮時都能反映出這種意義。即使是最有善意的贈送者也可能會陷入一些顯得無禮的習慣。</p>
</div><p>HuffPost asked Smith and other etiquette experts to share some common rude behaviors around gift-giving. Read on for eight faux pas to avoid when giving a gift and what you should do instead.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>HuffPost 請 Smith 和其他禮儀專家分享一些常見的送禮無禮行為。繼續閲讀，瞭解送禮時應避免的八個失禮之處以及你應該如何做。</p>
</div><h2><strong>Bringing Up The Cost</strong></h2>
<div class="lb-trans"><h2><strong>提及價格</strong></h2>
</div><p>“When giving a gift, don’t tell people how much it cost,” said Nick Leighton, an etiquette expert and cohost of the “Were You Raised by Wolves?” podcast. “The best gifts are the ones that are thoughtful, not the ones that are expensive. If you think back through all the gifts you’ve ever received in your life, the ones that you like the most definitely aren’t the most expensive ones.”</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“在送禮時，不要告訴別人這件禮物花了多少錢，” 禮儀專家、播客 “你是被狼養大的？” 的聯合主持人 Nick Leighton 説。“最好的禮物是那些用心的，而不是那些昂貴的。如果你回想一下你一生中收到的所有禮物，你最喜歡的那些肯定不是最貴的。”</p>
</div><p>A present doesn’t have to be pricey to be valuable to the recipient. Gift-givers should also be mindful of the relationship they have with that person and what price range would be appropriate.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>禮物不必昂貴才能對接受者有價值。送禮者還應考慮與對方的關係以及什麼價格範圍是合適的。</p>
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</div><p>“A rude behavior is commenting on the price,” Smith said. “Givers should be shopping within their own budgets. You should not be going into debt to give gifts. You may have spent a little or a lot. So long as it is within your budgeted amount, that is what is important.”</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“無禮的行為是評論價格，” Smith 説。“贈送者應該在自己的預算範圍內購物。你不應該為了送禮而負債。你可能花了少量或大量的錢。只要在你的預算範圍內，這才是重要的。”</p>
</div><h2><strong>Expecting A Gift In Return</strong></h2>
<div class="lb-trans"><h2><strong>期待回禮</strong></h2>
</div><p>“One of the most common, yet rude faux pas is once you give someone a gift and they open it with excitement, you then say, ‘So, where’s my gift?’” said Jackie Vernon-Thompson, the founder of From the Inside-Out School of Etiquette. “That is a huge no-no. A gift should never be offered with the expectation of receiving one in return. The purest form of giving is rooted in generosity, not anticipation.”</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“最常見且無禮的失禮之一是，當你給某人禮物，他們興奮地打開時，你接着説，‘那麼，我的禮物呢？’” From the Inside-Out 禮儀學校的創始人 Jackie Vernon-Thompson 説。“這是一個巨大的禁忌。禮物絕不應該在期待收到回禮的情況下贈送。最純粹的贈送形式根植於慷慨，而不是期待。”</p>
</div><p>She emphasized that gifting is not about expectations but about giving freely.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>她強調，贈送不是關於期待，而是關於自由地給予。</p>
</div><p>“If you give a gift, but there are strings attached, is it really a gift?” Leighton said. “If a gift requires an explanation, that might be a sign that it’s not a great gift.”</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“如果你送的禮物附帶條件，那它真的算是禮物嗎？” Leighton 説。“如果一份禮物需要解釋，那可能是它不是一份好禮物的跡象。”</p>
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</div><p>Indeed, the only real reward is the recipient’s expression of gratitude and excitement. And if you expect a gift in return, consider that you might receive it at a different time.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>確實，唯一真正的回報是接受者的感激和興奮的表情。如果你期待回禮，請考慮你可能會在不同的時間收到它。</p>
</div><p>“Gifting does tend to be a reciprocal relationship. But it does not always need to be concurrent,” Smith said.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“贈送確實傾向於是一種互惠關係。但它並不總是需要同時進行，” Smith 説。</p>
</div><p><img src="https://imageproxy.pbkrs.com/https://s.yimg.com/ny/api/res/1.2/8o7JIg5s1wTwweNq7rnE3w--/YXBwaWQ9aGlnaGxhbmRlcjt3PTEyNDI7aD04Mjg-/https://media.zenfs.com/en/the_huffington_post_584/d159cb03c8bde1b40ed1edfb3a88be1b" alt="" original-src="https://s.yimg.com/ny/api/res/1.2/8o7JIg5s1wTwweNq7rnE3w--/YXBwaWQ9aGlnaGxhbmRlcjt3PTEyNDI7aD04Mjg-/https://media.zenfs.com/en/the_huffington_post_584/d159cb03c8bde1b40ed1edfb3a88be1b"/></p>
<p>Gifting is not about expectations. Anastasia Babenko via Getty Images</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>贈送不是關於期待。Anastasia Babenko via Getty Images</p>
</div><h2><strong>Belittling Your Gift</strong></h2>
<div class="lb-trans"><h2><strong>貶低你的禮物</strong></h2>
</div><p>Smith advised against immediately belittling your gift when you give it to the recipient.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>Smith 建議在給接受者禮物時，不要立刻貶低你的禮物。</p>
</div><p>“‘It is just something small.’ ‘I found it on sale.’ ‘It really is not a big deal.’ Stop. You are giving someone a gift, do not diminish it,” she said.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“‘這只是一些小東西。’‘我在打折時找到的。’‘這真的沒什麼大不了的。’ 停下。你在給某人禮物，不要貶低它，” 她説。</p>
</div><h2><strong>Giving A Thoughtless Present</strong></h2>
<div class="lb-trans"><h2><strong>送出沒有心意的禮物</strong></h2>
</div><p>“Rude behavior involves giving a thoughtless gift,” said Diane Gottsman, an etiquette expert, author of “Modern Etiquette for a Better Life” and founder of The Protocol School of Texas. “For example, something that has been visibly used or worn. Or something that is clearly not meant for them or very little thought was put into the purchase.”</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“無禮的行為包括送出沒有心意的禮物，” 禮儀專家、書籍《更好生活的現代禮儀》的作者 Diane Gottsman 説。“例如，明顯被使用或磨損的東西。或者顯然不適合他們的東西，或者在購買時幾乎沒有考慮。”</p>
</div><p>Your gift doesn’t have to be expensive, but it should show some level of care or effort.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>你的禮物不必昂貴，但應該表現出一定程度的關心或努力。</p>
</div><p>“With gifts, it truly is the thought that counts,” Smith said. “While few would eschew a lavish gift, the closer you are with the giftee, the more thought should go into the giving.”</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“對於禮物，確實是心意最重要，” Smith 説。“雖然很少有人會拒絕奢華的禮物，但你與接受者的關係越親密，贈送時就應該投入更多的心思。”</p>
</div><h2><strong>Not Considering The Recipient</strong></h2>
<div class="lb-trans"><h2><strong>不考慮接受者</strong></h2>
</div><p>“When it comes to the gift-giver, please think of who you’re giving the gift to and make it appropriate for them, not something that you want or that you’d own and that with some thought you know just isn’t right,” said August Abbott, an etiquette expert with the Q&amp;A platform JustAnswer. “It’s important to think of the person you’re giving the gift to and not your own likes, wants, needs.”</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“在送禮者方面，請考慮你要送給誰，並使其適合他們，而不是你想要的或你擁有的東西，並且經過一些思考你知道這並不合適，” Q&amp;A 平台 JustAnswer 的禮儀專家 August Abbott 説。“重要的是考慮你要送禮物的人，而不是你自己的喜好、需求和想要的東西。”</p>
</div><p>If you don’t know the person well, she recommended choosing a safe option like a gift card to a coffee shop or a delivery service.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>如果你對這個人不太瞭解，她建議選擇一個安全的選項，比如咖啡店或外賣服務的禮品卡。</p>
</div><p>“Before selecting a gift, it is essential to approach the process with intention and thoughtfulness,” Vernon-Thompson said. “Consider the recipient’s personality, preferences and favorite things. The goal is to choose something they will genuinely appreciate, not an item that will be set aside or forgotten. It is often helpful to gently and subtly inquire about their wish list ― a little probing can ensure your gift truly resonates.”</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“在選擇禮物之前，重要的是以意圖和深思熟慮的方式接近這個過程，” Vernon-Thompson 説。“考慮接受者的個性、偏好和喜歡的事物。目標是選擇他們真正會欣賞的東西，而不是一個會被擱置或遺忘的物品。輕微而微妙地詢問他們的願望清單通常是有幫助的——一點探詢可以確保你的禮物真正引起共鳴。”</p>
</div><p><img src="https://imageproxy.pbkrs.com/https://s.yimg.com/ny/api/res/1.2/6vEWzRjIxIeGSPGq_EyJjg--/YXBwaWQ9aGlnaGxhbmRlcjt3PTEyNDI7aD04MzA-/https://media.zenfs.com/en/the_huffington_post_584/bc66abfe5028377a2e7aee790bf12061" alt="" original-src="https://s.yimg.com/ny/api/res/1.2/6vEWzRjIxIeGSPGq_EyJjg--/YXBwaWQ9aGlnaGxhbmRlcjt3PTEyNDI7aD04MzA-/https://media.zenfs.com/en/the_huffington_post_584/bc66abfe5028377a2e7aee790bf12061"/></p>
<p>Be mindful of the time and context of your gift-giving. Maryna Terletska via Getty Images</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>注意你送禮的時間和場合。Maryna Terletska via Getty Images</p>
</div><h2><strong>Giving An Uncomfortable Gift</strong></h2>
<div class="lb-trans"><h2><strong>送出不合適的禮物</strong></h2>
</div><p>“Refrain from giving personal and intimate gifts ― lingerie, robe, fragrance and the list goes on,” Vernon-Thompson advised. “These personal gifts may insinuate something beyond the present relationship. That, for sure, will cause the person to feel awkward.”</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“避免送出個人和親密的禮物——內衣、浴袍、香水等等，” Vernon-Thompson 建議。“這些個人禮物可能暗示超出當前關係的東西。這肯定會讓對方感到尷尬。”</p>
</div><p>She encouraged gift-givers to be mindful of the nature and depth of your relationship with the recipient from their perspective.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>她鼓勵送禮者從接受者的角度考慮你們之間關係的性質和深度。</p>
</div><p>“You never want to give a gift that feels too personal, too extravagant or creates discomfort because your interpretation of the relationship was different from theirs,” Vernon-Thompson said. “When in doubt, select something neutral, appropriate and modest. Excessive spending may unintentionally create a sense of obligation ― you don’t want that.”</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“你絕不想送出一份過於個人化、過於奢華或讓人感到不適的禮物，因為你對關係的理解與他們不同，” Vernon-Thompson 説。“如果不確定，選擇一些中性、合適和適度的禮物。過度消費可能無意中造成一種負擔感——你可不想這樣。”</p>
</div><h2><strong>Blatantly Regifting</strong></h2>
<div class="lb-trans"><h2><strong>明顯的再贈禮</strong></h2>
</div><p>People have a lot of opinions about regifting, but Smith said it’s OK so long as it’s not blatant. Giving the sweater you received from your cousin to your other cousin might be playing with fire, for instance. If you’re intentionally passing down an important family heirloom, then you can be open about its significance and history.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>人們對再贈禮有很多看法，但 Smith 表示，只要不是明顯的再贈禮，這樣做是可以的。例如，把你從表弟那裏收到的毛衣送給另一個表弟可能是在玩火。如果你是有意傳遞一個重要的家族傳家寶，那麼你可以坦誠它的意義和歷史。</p>
</div><p>“Otherwise, so long as it is new, unused, out of the original wrapping, and the first giver and the new giftee are not in the same social circles, it is perfectly acceptable to regift,” Smth said.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“否則，只要它是新的、未使用的、未拆封的，並且原贈與者和新的接受者不在同一個社交圈子裏，再贈禮是完全可以接受的，” Smith 説。</p>
</div><h2><strong>Giving The Gift At An Inappropriate Time</strong></h2>
<div class="lb-trans"><h2><strong>在不合適的時間送禮</strong></h2>
</div><p>There’s etiquette in your choice of gift-giving timing as well.</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>在選擇送禮的時機上也有禮儀。</p>
</div><p>“The giver should also be aware of their surroundings,” Smith said. “First, if no one else is exchanging gifts and there are others present, your gift should be tucked away until later. Second, if there is something else happening, the gift may need to wait.”</p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p>“贈與者還應該注意周圍的環境，” Smith 説。“首先，如果沒有其他人交換禮物，而在場有其他人，你的禮物應該暫時收起來，等到稍後再送。其次，如果正在進行其他活動，禮物可能需要等一等。”</p>
</div><h3>Related...</h3>
<div class="lb-trans"><h3>相關...</h3>
</div><ul>
<li>The Rudest Things You Can Do While Hosting Overnight Guests</li>
<li>15 Outdated Etiquette Rules You Can Throw Out, From Elbows On The Table To Funeral Attire</li>
<li>The Rudest Things You Can Do At A Holiday Party</li>
</ul>
<div class="lb-trans"><ul>
<li>在招待過夜客人時你可以做的最無禮的事情</li>
<li>15 條你可以拋棄的過時禮儀規則，從肘部放在桌子上到葬禮着裝</li>
<li>在節日聚會上你可以做的最無禮的事情</li>
</ul>
</div><p><strong>Read the original on HuffPost</strong></p>
<div class="lb-trans"><p><strong>在 HuffPost 上閲讀原文</strong></p>
</div>

送禮時可能表現出的最不禮貌的行為